Easter

Spring is by far my favorite season.  We're coming out of winter, everything is turning green again and you're starting to go outside more and enjoy the nicer weather.  Plus, my birthday is in the spring.  :-)

Easter was always a time of traditions with the family.  We would color eggs and on Sunday morning before church there would be an Easter basket full of goodies.  If I was at Grandma's, which I usually was, my basket had to be on the table because she had radiant heat and the chocolate would melt.  We learned that the hard way, haha.  One year, all of the chocolate in the basket was melted or too soft to touch.  We laughed so hard and of course I was disappointed but Grandma took us shopping and we got more chocolate.

Living in NY is hard when the Holidays come around.  It makes me homesick for my family and our traditions.  I have children now and I'm trying to start traditions for us but they're not there yet.  This is the first year Elliott colored eggs and he didn't really "get" it.  Plus, it was him and I and two of our friends kids.  I was the adult in the group.  

Is that what is making me sad?  I've grown up and those traditions are gone?  I don't know.  I know if we were with the family that we would all color eggs.  I wouldn't be the oldest adult, but I wouldn't be the youngest.  I would share my traditions with my children with my family.  That too me seems normal.  Seems like that's how it should be.

Amazing.  I am sitting here with tears in my eyes thinking about those things I'd love to do with my family this weekend and I'm truly sad.  It's just coloring eggs and eating candy, truthfully more candy than any one person needs.  :-)  But I am sad.

I have baskets and things for the baskets for my children.  They will have good memories.  Well, there will be pictures to show them that they had a good time.  But it's not the same.  Will the appreciate the childhood memories I make for them?  In the end is it all worth it?  Is this just "growing pains"?

The joys of growing up huh?  Does everyone feel this way?  Please tell me it's not just me that misses the childhood traditions.

The Power of THREE

As you probably know I'm a numbers person.  I like numbers, patterns and anything of the sort.  I'm very logical and not so lateral.

I was looking at our tree a week or so ago and saw one of the ornaments we bought the first Christmas we were married.  It simply says 2006 made out of candy canes and there's a snowman on it.  I giggled a little and said "well, as badly as I wanted the Twins here in December I now know God has a different plan".  

I spent the next few days thinking about this.  Some of you might say I was obsessing but that sounds so "mental" that I will just say I thought about it.  It's my blog, so, I can call it whatever I want.  :-D

I realized that every three years something big has happened in our lives.


2000 - Mike and I met!


2003 - I moved to NY and as that happened Mike finally told his friends about us.  haha


2006 - We were married.  Yes, it was April Fool's Day but it is, in fact, legal.


2009 - Elliott was born and Mike and I became parents.  This was no easy undertaking and I never thought it would happen.


That brings me to the Twins.  They're due Feb 10, 2012.  That's following the three step rule.


So, I asked Mike what in the world we were going to do in 2015 and without missing a beat he said "Win the Lottery".
Honestly, I like that plan.  I hate that I have to wait at least 1096 days but hey, it's better than never winning.  Right?  lol


From Wikipedia......
The "rule of three" is a principle in writing that suggests that things that come in threes are inherently funnier, more satisfying, or more effective than other numbers of things.

The Latin phrase, "omne trium perfectum" (everything that comes in threes is perfect, or, every set of three is complete) also conveys the same idea as the "rule of three", interestingly using exactly three words.

Looks like God had a plan for us.  Which we all know I love since I am such a planner!!

So, here is to a fabulous 2012.  Which, by the way, has 366 days and that is evenly divisible by (you guessed it) THREE!!

Tastefully Simple vs Passion Parties

Almost a year ago (November 2010) I decided to start doing In-Home parties for Tastefully Simple.  I was still active with Passion Parties and I was going to see which one was better for me and go forward from there.  I gave myself a year to make that decision.  Amazingly enough it didn't take me 6 months to see what's right for me.

I watch people post on Facebook and tell people how amazing their job is and while I know a lot of people are truly happy that a lot of people aren't as happy as they say they are but they want to build a team so they are never negative when they post.

When I first started with Tastefully Simple I thought "this will be great, I love food and my customer base has so many more options that with Passion Parties".  Plus, I figured anyone not interested in toys would probably be interested in food since everyone eats.  :-)

Tastefully Simple has proven to be so much more than that to me.  Yes, my customer base is broader but it goes beyond that.  I have Hosts and Customers on my Facebook and we interact with each other.  We can joke, laugh, be serious, whatever.  I realized that my Passion Parties Hosts and Customers don't really interact with me and I figure that's because I know intimate details about their life and they don't want to explain how they know me.  LOL

Tastefully Simple has also shown that it is essentially drama-free.  Yes, I know that whenever you put a big group of women together this is bound to be some drama and that is there but man oh man, there isn't the drama that there is with Passion Parties.  I wasn't ashamed of what I did, I was helping people with their relationships, opening up lines of communication, helping people keep the spice in so there was less boredom and cheating, etc.  What I was ashamed of was being associated with a lot of the other consultants.  The saying about laying with dogs gets you fleas is true.  Even if you don't get fleas, everyone who sees you thinks you have them.

I can't say enough how happy I am to be where I am at with Tastefully Simple.  I am by no means done and just letting it be but I am constantly building my team, my customer base; my business.  I am truly happy with what I do.  I worried that I wouldn't be able to let go of Passion Parties and now I think......"what took you so long?".

So, as you see my posts or receive emails from me sharing something from Tastefully Simple please know that I believe in this company 100% and am only trying to share this 'gem' with everyone!  It hasn't disappointed me and it hasn't disappointed any of my customers or team members.

I will close with a shameless plug of my website
www.TastefullySimple.com/web/akaye

Plus, if you're interested, you can check out our catalog online at
http://media.tastefullysimple.com/Ecatalog/Ecatalog.html 

Fertility

Here I am again starting fertility.  I guess that means there will be a lot more blogs because sometimes the only thing that helps me is to get my feelings out.  They say you shouldn't keep things bottled up inside so I guess I'm just following that advice.

You may or may not know but in order for Mike and I to start a family we had to go through fertility.  It was by far one of the hardest things I've ever been through in my life.  Yes, the end result was worth it all but that doesn't make the journey any less painful.  I will say that when I was pregnant with Elliott the hurt from the fertility mostly subsided and wasn't a constant thought but when I look back on it......man oh man!

Here I am today, sort of celebrating that it's my 10th and final day of taking Progesterone.  It's a lovely *eyeroll* medicine that will make me have a period.  I looked up the side effects and it's a viscous, viscous medicine.

Medroxyprogesterone may cause side effects. Tell your doctor if any of these symptoms are severe or do not go away:

• breasts that are tender or produce a liquid (nope)
• changes in menstrual flow (nope)
• irregular vaginal bleeding or spotting (nope)
• acne (one or two pimples)
• growth of hair on face (haven't had to shave yet)
• loss of hair on scalp (not missing any big chunks)
• difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep (this one hit me hard)
• drowsiness (figured this was because of the last one)
• upset stomach (attributed this to the last two)
• weight gain or loss (blamed the cookies for this one)
  
  
  The last three are my favorites and the ones that I have the most......
  
  • Depression
  • Mood Swings
  • Confusion; inability to concentrate or think straight 

I remember this medicine but it seems so much worse this time.  I hate this medicine.  
Hate
HATE
H! A! T! E! 
this medicine and the way it makes me feel.  


I guess you can say "you've been warned".  I know that while I'm swinging from one mood to another, with an occasional stop at another mood that it's difficult.  I hate to blame the medicine but, it is, in fact, the medicine.


My plan is to do a cycle and be pregnant.  Seems simple enough.  One round of meds and then be done with it.  Think I can pull that off?  I hope so but I'm not holding my breath.  So many people told me that when women with fertility issues had a baby that most likely they were able to conceive again without any help.  Well, without any help from medical professionals, she obviously needed her significant other or at least a "designated hitter".  :)  I, however, was not that lucky.  


As I started to type that luck never seems to be on my side I had to stop typing because there was a little man at a toy box asking for help (because he was too short to reach the toy he wanted) and he was yelling "Mama, Mama, MAMA" and when I went over to help him he gave me a kiss and a big hug.


So, as I sit here crying because he warms my heart and soul just know that I got the subtle reminder that while this tough on me in all ways but mostly emotionally that IT IS WORTH IT!  I love being a Mom! 

My Exciting Party!

I originally posted this blog on April 27, 2008.  I'm sharing now and on blogger.com to share the funnies with my friends.  Jenn, I hope you enjoy!!  :)

My exciting party

As most of you know I do In-Home parties.  You never know what sort of party you're going to have.  A room full of drunk women who don't care what you're doing, women who are saving their money for the stripper that will be there later, etc etc.  I've had a few parties that have made me cry on the way home, I've had some fantastic parties that made me want to shout from my rooftop what I do, but last night was a first for me.

I did a party about an hour from my house.  All the way to the party I'm thinking about all the fabulous stuff I learned at Convention.  I'm quite proud of the Hostess Coaching with my hostess and am well prepared to have an awesome party!!

I walk in, everyone is there and ready to go.  I start to set up, pass out folders and we're laughing and having fun.  These are beer drinking women!  Down to earth, fun loving women.  We're laughing a ton.

We did the bath and body stuff and we're getting ready to move on.  Before I started with my toys, I passed around my books and told them to take a smoke break and we'd return in 5 minutes.  While most are outside smoking I was inside chatting up the 3 women that were eating and looking at my books.

I start to notice the decor of the house and while I hadn't been able to put my finger on it, I realize that it looks like I walked into HALLOWEEN!  Fake spiders all over the coffee table and throws over the curtains and furniture that are handmade afghans but they look like cobwebs.  I asked one of the women sitting there why it looked like Halloween.  She laughed and said "Oh, she didn't tell you?"

Suddenly I was nervous.  Had I not done enough Hostess Coaching?  Was there something that I missed?  OMG What did I forget?  My mind was racing!  Then the guest said "They love spiders.  Well, he loves spiders and she just tolerates it."  *whew*  Panic diverted.  No biggie!  They decorate with plastic spiders.  Then the guest went on........
They have 6 tarantulas!

I froze.

Did I mention I don't like critters?  If it's an animal and you can't pet it, then I'm not interested.

Ok, where are they?  Am I close to them?  Dear God, I hope these people are sane enough to CAGE the tarantulas!  I mustered up my courage to ask WHERE they kept them.  My voice sounded like I held a toy on my throat when I spoke.

Now, keep in mind, the room is filling back up.  I'm now suddenly the center of attention as each woman watches for my reaction.  I'm the last one to know.  They've all been in my shoes.  Oh yes, we're having big fun now.

I ask where they're kept.  She says "Oh, they have their own room, one of the bedrooms."

THANK GOD!

I'm a little worse for wear, but let's move on.

***Fast Forward to the Ordering Room***

My Hostess says "You have to use this room here. But, since the spiders are in there a couple of the women won't come in to place their orders.  You don't mind though right?  You're cool no?"

How could I say No?  Where was I going to do the orders, the front yard??  I went in with her and said, well, this is a first for me.  Walked right past them and yes, they were all caged! *big sigh* Ok, I told myself 'be quick like a bunny, get in and get out; be quick like a bunny, get in and get out'!!!

My bag fell on my leg and I thought I wet my pants.  Nope, false alarm but I'd better use the restroom, just in case.  The guests come in and they're standing between me and the spiders.  Then one of the guests was standing there talking to another guest and they're discussing the spiders and the room and she suddenly screams "OH MY GOD".

I almost jumped out the window!

COMMITMENT

COMMIT - [kuh-mit]
verb, com-mit-ted, com-mit-ting

to bind or obligate, as by pledge or assurance; pledge: to commit oneself to a promise; to be committed to a course of action.

 

I'm beginning to think people don't know or understand the meaning to that word.  Maybe I'm wrong, maybe they do understand and they just don't care.

 

I was always taught to treat people the way I want to be treated but I've always wanted people to know that I want to be treated the way I treat them yet they don't get it.  So why am I bothering?

 

When you make a commitment to someone, no matter how big or how small, in my opinion, you need to keep that commitment.  Now, I realize that sometimes things, beyond our control, come up and no matter how much you'd like to do what you promised, it's just not possible.  Those situations are not what I'm referring to here.

 

Maybe I shouldn't take it so personally but it pisses me off and honestly, it deeply hurts my feelings.  How hard is it to do what you said you'd do?  If you don't want to do it then when originally asked say "NO".  That concept escapes me too.  People have actually said to me "you're so hard to say no to".  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  Let me lay this out for you, using that logic.  ***please note I refrained from calling anyone Sparky*** :)

 

I ask you to do something (don't care what it is for this example) and you don't really want to do it but you feel like I'm so hard to say no to so you say yes, even though you don't want to do it.  So, I make my plans accordingly and move forward with my life.  Time gets closer to you doing what I asked you to do and now you say you can't.  Two things happen in that moment, first and foremost......You just said NO to me (wasn't impossible huh?) and second, now I'm screwed because I stopped looking for someone to do it since you said you would so now I'm back to square one except it's probably day of or day before you were going to do whatever I asked of you and so usually I have to cancel my plans or change them.  In case you hadn't noticed......this is what I was trying to avoid in the first place.

 

What am I missing here?  Why do people do this?  All it takes is for someone to leave you high and dry, just once and you should go out of your way not to do the same to other people.  Is that logic too basic?  Are people not capable of this?

 

Now, before I end this blog let me point out something.  Not everyone in my life is this way.  That's right, I'm not saying every person I know doesn't keep their commitments to me (or others) but there are several who don't.

To those who do, please know, I love and adore that personality trait in you!  :) 

Relocating

Friendships when you relocate can be difficult.

Seven years ago I moved from Kansas City to New York City.  Big move when you just compare the cities but there's so much more to things when you relocate.  Start with the basics, you have to learn where things are, how to get around, where the best local places are, what places you should avoid, a new job, a new house.......I could go on and on but I think you get the idea.

Friendships..............well, that's a different story.  My friendships in Kansas City have changed, which is to be expected.  Yet it's harder to meet people in NY because I'm no longer in school and for the last five years I've worked from home.  I wasn't anticipating that.

When I moved I started this transformation that I guess I expected yet was surprised by it.  I know that doesn't make much sense but I'm sure you can understand.  I knew that certain things would change because of my new surroundings but I thought who I "was" would stay the same.   WRONG!  My moral compass still points in the same direction and I still have the same values but in a city that moves fast I lost what little patience I did have.  Yet, because there are so many more people and we don't all speak the same language I've learned to have more patience with people individually.  Driving.......well, Kansas City is the Road Rage Capital of the World and in NY it's just about being aggressive.  Here, people want to get where they're going and if you pissed them off they'd just like to get in front and be done with you but in Kansas City they want to get in front and then slow down and piss you off in the same way you pissed them off.

I still want the same things out of my friendships but it's different and after a lot of soul searching I think I finally figured it out.
My Kansas City Friends.......
Some of my friendships couldn't handle the distance.  Even someone that I thought would be standing by my death bed; unfortunately the friendship was split by the miles between us.
Some of my friendships have maintained and there have been visits between both parties and they're solid friendships.
Some of my friendships were people that I knew but weren't too close with and now, even though we're 1200 miles apart we've found a new connection and are closer than ever.
Lastly, some of my friendships started after I moved and even though we're so far apart we've built a strong bond that I do believe will stand the test of time.

That brings me to my New York friends........
I don't have as many categories for them.  lol
The first difference in meeting people here is that I'm not from here so I think differently about things, even simple things like "food", or it could be religious, ethnic or sexual differences.  Those differences were things that I thought would be no big deal but boy was I wrong.  Plus, life is very different for me now (as it is for everyone) I'm no longer in school or living in my first apartment where everyone came over weekly for a Game Night.  Now we're all adults, with Partners, JOBs, Children and bills.  A lot of people's friendships change just by the simple act of growing up but when you compound that with changing cities it's even more of a change.  You learn that it's not about the quantity of friends you have, but it's about the quality of the friendships you keep.

I don't regret moving and wouldn't change it for the world but I listen to people who say "I'll move, no big deal." and I think about my situation.  

I started over in a new city and I started over in every aspect of my life.  A new house, a new job, new favorite places to eat and new friendships.  I still have the same family but with me moving even the family dynamic changed.

It took me a while to realize that what I thought was me being homesick wasn't that at all.  It was me wanting the past back.  I wanted my friends to come over for Game Night on Saturday night, I wanted to skip work one day and go some place fun with a friend for a lot of laughter.  It doesn't matter where I live, those things don't happen like they did before.  They're still possible, just not on a weekly basis.  The past is the past and it has made me who I am but I am in charge from this point forward. 

Does this mean I passed the test?  Does this mean I grew up?.